#i was genuinely shocked tho like DUDE YOU GO BACK IN FOUR DAYS

[muchmossymess]

Truly a curse being the most functional person in my household

[peachymhaechan]

“Wait... You’re the Little Voice Inside My Head?”

Genre: fluff, soulmate! au; you can hear your soulmate’s thoughts, which isn’t always the best thing

Pairing: Lucas X gender neutral reader

Warnings: cussing, you will have a cavity by the end of this it’s too damn sWEEt

A/N: wong yukhei can stay in his mcfreakin lane:)) okay:)) this hurt me to write he truly did make his way up my bias list and I am .? okay,, I guess this is what we are doing

ever since you were little, you always heard voices inside your head

those voices being 1. you, and 2. a little boy you had never heard out loud in your life

the first time you heard him was when you were four, playing with an imaginary friend in your room

I wonder what Mommy is making for dinner, you thought and lo and behold

I want my mommy to make something without vegetables!

uhhhhhhhhh .?

that was not your voice

but you being a four year old with an imaginary friend, you were like “cool I guess, sometimes it be that way” 

at dinner you brought it up to your parents, but of course they passed it off as your imaginary friends

I mean,, lets be real

you were little and ran around the house all day talking to your imaginary friends, so that was the logical explanation in that situation

that was only the first incident you had with the boy speaking in your head

and lemme just say, as y’all got older, it only got wilder

you only knew that he heard what you thought for one reason

he’d always, and I mean ALWAYS

respond

one time in elementary school, your class was taking a math test and you had no fuckin clue what was going on

uhhhhhhh what the frick is 8 times 9 divided by 2 plus 4???

don’t worry tho, your mystery boy came in clutch

40! The answer is 40! his little voice chimed, saving your ass and being the reason you scraped by with a b

as time went on, you heard him more and more, and occasionally yall would have full conversations

only when you got older did you realize

shit dawg, this is my soulmate

once you hit middle school, you finally sat your parents down and basically said

that imaginary friend that would talk in my head when I was little hasn’t gone away and im pretty sure that’s my soulmate quirk

of course your parents were like. oh ? worm ? 

you explained to them the whole thing tho

“ive had legitimate conversations with him before, he hears some of my thoughts and I hear his. I can’t really control what all he hears, though, and neither can he, so it’s very weird to hear things out of context.” 

the entire time your parents sat there, both confused and happy

on one hand, they didn’t fully understand how it all worked, 

and on the other, they were proud because their lil baby was all grown up, talking to their soulmate!! moving towards the second part of their life !!

from that moment, your quirk progressed even more

you started to talk to him more and more, and he heard more and more of your thoughts

it was odd, really, because everybody has thoughts that make them guilty

you know, thoughts that can embarrass you for even thinking them?? 

not because they’re dumb (although let’s be real, everyone has their fair share of dumb thoughts), 

but because you know they’re mean:/

one night you were up thinking that,

thinking: you probably hate me…. all of my thoughts are so mean and harmful, and it brings me shame to know that I can be so vile to people without even meaning to. I’m sorry…. I wouldn’t blame you for hating me. 

for some reason, your mystery boy was awake (bitch go tf to sleep it’s three in the damn morning) and he responded

hey, two things…. 1. you’re such a dumbass, and 2. it’s not your thoughts that matter, but how you react to them afterward. the fact that you think your thoughts can come off as mean show that you care, and that you’re not as shitty of a person that you think you are. 

listen,,, we all know lucas ain’t always that deep but we can pretend for this au ok

you sat there in complete shock and then he went, anyways you adorable idiot, go to sleep, you have finals in the morning. 

from that night on, you talked to him more and more

had a bad day? lucas would know all about it as soon as you got home

lucas did something embarrassing while out in public? you’d hear about it while in public as he tried not to spontaneously combust

you will never believe what I just did…. the barista told me to have a good day and I said “you’re welcome”

of course you laughed,,, that dumbass is supposed to be your soulmate ?? 

how

but you told him chill dude, everyone says shit like that sometimes, it happens to the best of us 

he was with you during your cringey phases (as you were with him during his) 

he was there the first time you had your heart broken

your friends all told you not to date the popular basketball player, but you said yeet I guess and well

lucas consoled you as you cried, not over that boy but over yourself for thinking something like that could work

“I don’t know why I even tried. He isn’t you, and he never will be. Hell, I don’t even know your damn name but I know we fit together more than that guy and I ever could.” 

that night was the first night you learned his name, wong yukhei, or lucas as his friends called him

“My name is Wong Yukhei, but my friends call me Lucas. And I’m sorry some guy treated you like shit. You don’t deserve to be treated like that, you deserve the whole world. I wish I knew who you were, where you were, so I can finally meet you and tell you everything I never told you.”

and that was the first night he learned your name 

“y/n, my name is y/n, and I know we are going to meet soon. I just know it. I can feel it.” 

and you were kind of right ??

it all depends on what your definition of soon is tbh

bc that whole sappy convo took place in your junior year of high school

and y’all met in college !!

it was high key odd and not at all how either of you planned to meet, tho

it was your first week at college, and you were nervous af

parents? gone. responsibilities? crippling. adulting? expected. 

you finished moving in a while ago, and by then had met your not so pleasant roommate 

let’s just say uhhhhhh this roommate had been a complete and utter dickhead

so you threw on some shoes, grabbed your laptop and wallet, and went to the library on campus

after all, it was only the first week, there shouldn't be too many

you walked in and the first thing you saw was someone crying and saying “FUCK SCHOOL” 

naturally you were like, “bitch me too. tf?” 

but decided to not say that to that kid so you quickly skrrted the fuck out there (yote, if you will)

as you dipped real quick, you went through your options in your head

coffee? target? dorms? 

coffee seemed like your best bet, so you hauled your ass to the campus café 

as soon as the door opened, stress melted from your mind

i’ll drink to that, bro

the place was not too busy, it was during the middle of the day so people were either asleep or busy

there wasn't a line so you walked up to the person working at the register 

“shit fuck what should I order from this coffee place??” 

“mountain dew with two shots of espresso” - the ever so helpful Wong Yukhei

“okay what the fuck??” 

“lemme get uhhhhhhh iced coffee I guess,” you said, paying and waiting for your drink

while waiting, you went and grabbed a straw, and out of the corner of your eye you spotted a fuckin. GiAnt enter the establishment

he seemed goofy tho,,, so u were like. ok. cool. pop off, I guess. 

you couldn’t hear him speak, but inside your head you heard, “Iced coffee.” 

“yeah, what about it? I already ordered it, you’re a little late.” 

he did not respond which had you going ?? miss keisha, miss keisha, oh my fucking god she fucking dead !

you patiently waited for your cold bean juice while the guy paid and literally stumbled right by your feet to get a straw for himself

before you could ask if the Clumsy Giant was okay, the barista called out, “ Y/N!” 

you went to pick up the drink, and felt two eyes drilling holes in the back of your head

naturally, you turned around like. ? we got beef? 

but found the actually kinda cute boy staring at you in shock

“What?” you sheepishly asked, not sure if you had something on your face or if something was genuinely wrong, which would explain why that weirdo stared dead at you 

???

“Y/N.... y-your name is Y/N?” he asked, and his voice clicked right away

fuck, dude

you already knew the answer, 

you could recognize that voice anywhere

but you still wanted to ask and make sure you are not dreaming

however, before you could ask, 

the barista called out his name

“Lucas!” 

f u c k, dude

“Wong Yukhei?” 

“Y/N L/N?” 

you two both broke out into a grin upon hearing the other say your name out loud

yall clung to each other, wrapping the other in a huge hug

meanwhile, the barista was standing behind the counter, waiting for lucas to grab his drink like :/ i’ll wait!

“this is touching, and all.... but can you please grab your coffee?” 

“THAT IS MY SOULMATE!” lucas announced, obviously giddy at finding you

and tbh, you were feeling it, too

yall sat down at a little table and for a while, just stared at the person sitting across from the other

then, “I’m glad I met you.” 

“Me, too,” he agreed

and thus the start of a relationship with pretty much no communication issues ever, 

mostly due to the fact that there were no secrets 

not that either of you minded, because lets face it

you two had souls that were reflections from one another, and you can’t hide a secret from yourself so why would you hide a secret from him? 

[goldenscript]

badboy!yuto

adachi yuto, japanese exchange student and baseball player extraordinaire

his pitch is insane,,, latest record was 89.5 mph but he might’ve upped it (he did and he’s still aiming to surpass the best recorded speed of 105.1) since the school’s newspaper last interviewed him,,, nervously

he may be a well-known around school for being one of the top-ranking baseball players but he’s actually really intimidating 

equipped with a brooding look and an almost always resting bitch face a lot of people find him,,,, hard to approach and he likes that

being in a new country is tough - getting to know the language and the customs is like being a little kid in elementary school and it’s because of this very reason that he really hates people trying to belittle him or look down on him

it certainly doesn’t help that just by going there has made other people treat him like an actual child but if there’s yet another thing about yuto then it’s the fact that he has this need to prove others wrong about him

there was a kid in like fifth grade who totally ragged on him,, really made yuto feel like he wouldn’t amount to anything especially in baseball and ok sure he was a pretty scrawny kid at the time, a bit of a late bloomer in the puberty department but y’know everyone matures at their own pace physically and mentally

and anyway, it’s this very kid that has just driven yuto to do the very best that he can even if that means overworking himself and only really putting baseball first

because of that, his grades are pretty mediocre which is funny because he just about calculates and figure just how much he can get away with slacking over just to do the bare minimum

it works though,,, his teachers can’t complain since he is putting in effort and his coaches don’t mind so long as he’s getting the required gpa and coming to practice (which he does almost religiously)

and it’s just really remarkable that this sole drive just to prove someone wrong and get back at them for really doubting him drives him that much

his life has always been shrouded in doubt and insecurity and lots of belittlement and out of everything,,, baseball has always offered some kind of comfort to him

he’ll just stand on that field, whether it’s turf or actual grass, and finds peace in all the screaming because the moment he takes his pitcher’s stance it’s like there’s this silence and everything goes still even during his wind-up and suddenly all this power is thrown into a measly pitch and it has people roaring over him

they didn’t care if he was too foreign or too scrawny or too whatever, they were there and they appreciated his skill and i think that’s all he’s ever really wanted as he grew up into the man he is now

instead of sticking to japan, he decided to take up a full-ride scholarship to south korea and when they announced that at the sports banquet he couldn’t help but feel this swell of pride even if that one kid couldn’t see it happen

it’s a rare sight but it made him smile that day because for once he was acknowledged y’know?

anyway, coming to south korea was almost a culture shock (not by a grand scale but enough that it threw him off balance for a while)

it brought on a dry spell for him because he didn’t have friends or anyone to really be there for him to lean on because he was literally alone and not even with someone he could properly communicate with

it was frustrating on the largest scale and it made him feel even more hesitant and angry to deal with anyone other than his roommate, wooseok, who (bless his soul) is a sweetheart and always invites him to hang or play videogames,,,, sometimes he humors the giant

it took time for yuto to get acquainted with the other eight boys in wooseok’s friend circle but it worked out in weird ways

although yuto can’t exactly socialize in a huge gathering, he would spend one on one time with each of them and found comfortable niches with each so he does have a soft spot somewhere behind all his hostility

he won’t admit it a lot either but he’s more of a shower than a teller

but ok, anyway, even tho his first half of the year in south korea has been a huge struggle, he’s used it to push himself athletically and that’s why he’s getting noticed a lot more by others

they’re still intimidated as ever and rumors come flying in all directions about him killing someone with his pitch and none of the students in the journalism club want to interview him for the paper lmao

there was one brave soul but he’s still pretty,,, shaken from yuto’s rbf and you were actually out in this really cool study abroad in japan about tech culture and reported your findings and,,,,

basically you’re literally the only one who hasn’t heard of yuto aka the hardest person to interview on the baseball team so when you heard about a job that no one was willing to take because it was too scary you were just like “LMAO LEMME AT IT”

that and because he piqued your interest

to say the least, you’re pretty made to be in journalism because you refuse to half-ass anything you do and if they want to do a piece on understanding adachi yuto, literally the hottest rising star on the uni’s baseball team, then dammit you’re gonna do it

so, that’s exactly what you do

you go and hunt him down and approach his coach about interviewing him whenever there’s free time because you’re respectful like that y’know and when the older man grins at you and gives you the ok, you approach him on the bench and kindly talk to him about doing an interview

that alone throws him off because 1) you’re not scared of him??? usually just approaching him is nerve wracking for everyone and anyone but here you are just sauntering over like it’s nobody’s business

he just acts like it’s nothing though, coolly saying, “yeah sure whatever - we can do it right now”

“now?” you ask this with some confusion since you usually have some pretty long, extensive interviews just to get a good piece out because that’s how you are - you’re thorough

not many people in the club agree with you since it’s almost like a waste of time to them but neither you nor do the editor care very much because you put out really good stuff

even some of the stuff you wrote in high school are still circulating around as examples of what one should do and your methods too

 you’re not very black and white, you like grey areas and understanding concepts and people especially when they’re misunderstood and yuto is definitely no exception to that

so when he nods and simply says, “i know this won’t take long anyway, so why not right? we shouldn’t waste either of our time”

of course this throws you off,,, but you just nod and start off with some simple questions (to you) like what made him pursue baseball, how much he practices, what are some of his lucky items and pregame ritual habits, and like what are his goals as a player

like i said you’re thorough and even though you said these were simple, yuto was expecting things like “what’s your favorite part of playing baseball?” (pitching, duh) & “is mlb your goal for the future?” they’re pretty basic - during that first interview, he got even simpler things like what was his favorite color and what was his favorite base, and it made him hate that interview,,, significantly

the only redeeming factor of it was how cool they made him sound with his pitching speed record and that’s of course something he prides himself in but it felt so superficial and off,,, he didn’t like it

he didn’t quite feel belittled or anything but it made him disappointed that despite all his hard work,,, no one really cared enough to get to know him ya feel?

it’s silly but part of him working so hard is also for attention and that validation that he never vocally desires

so for you,,, to actually ask him things outside of his pitching speed record and what he plans outside of school and all that,,, is kinda nice

you can tell by the way he loosens up just a tad that he just has really high defenses and it makes you wonder why,, ,like by journalist instincts but genuine curiosity

and you get your answers (”this kid in school,” “four hours minimum a day,” “this keychain my mom gave me” (it’s this little pochacco bc she was like 99.9% certain that he would go into soccer LOL) and “chew hubba bubba gum - the kinda from the roll or it’s a no go, must wear something red SOMEWHERE, and the keychain has to be nearby”, and “surpass 105.1″) not that you’re in any rush because you really do like to get to know the people you’re interviewing

you’re the sort of person that believes in building connections with others - it’s really how one gets a good article and how to thrive in life like although you don’t talk to everyone you know / met on a daily basis you’d like to think that as long as those relationships weren’t superficial during that time you spent with them then it’s worthwhile

so you find all his answers really endearing and kind of cute even though it’s this stoic dude answering all your questions like he has other things to do and ofc you’re not even offended in the slightest because you understand that people get stiff over these things and it feels like people just haven’t been answering him the right questions anyway

but you being you, asks him the one questions he’s actually hoped to hear: “why 105.1?” 

he grins at you, like a genuine one that actually blows you away because his cheekbones are so gloriously prominent and light is just shining in his eyes and honestly if you were a photographer you would’ve really liked to capture this moment but before he can answer his coach is calling him onto the field and he turns to you almost apologetically

but you wave him off with a grin: “guess this means we gotta continue this interview right?” 

a flash of relief washes over his features before he gives you a brief nod, “guess so” 

you have your tape recorder still going, an heirloom of your mom’s because she loved journalism just as much as you do before she had you and in a way you’re fulfilling this dream for the both of you, and instruct him to recite his number for you

he looks a little exasperated but he does it and grumbles a farewell before jogging back onto the field and you go back to your dorm to listen through the interview, wanting to be thorough, and when you get to the part where he recites his number you jot that down with a wide grin

because deep down you really do think yuto is great - you don’t know it with complete certainty but that brief interview was more than enough so you shoot him a text about meeting up on thursday

to which he replies quite quickly in an affirmation

when the two of you meet, it’s at the park by the school’s garden and it’s absolutely beautiful - you know it’s completely unfamiliar to many people because you really have to look so you wind up finding yuto just take him there and he’s kinda flustered about it but it’s cute on him 

you take a moment to turn on your tape recorder and turn to him to ask the question you both left on 

his answer: “it’s the world record for the fastest pitch but i want to have the fastest pitch” 

there’s still a whole round of questions for him to answer and after a good hour of just bantering, you actually find him endearing and funny and really sweet beneath the brooding rbf

and the more he’s with you, the more he wants to open up even if it just for some interview because he feels acknowledged and appreciated 

with you, there’s something different that stirs in his chest - the ease that he felt after getting acquainted with wooseok comes with you but even more so

he really likes the way the gardenias and lilies complement your features, how the sun shines on you two and you bask in it

for reasons beyond him, he’s actually kinda sad that after this he won’t see much of you because there’s still a lot he’d like to know and ask you but between answering your questions and thinking ahead, it’s hard to interject his own considering it’s his interview

and tbh you’re pretty sad about it too but that sort of thing doesn’t hit you until it’s over and you’re playing the tape recording over and suddenly it’s like,,,, well, you want to know more about yuto

so you make a decision

after you’re done with the piece, you hit yuto up and let him read the manuscript and he’s in freakin’ awe because no one has ever really talked about him in the way that you did and he just turns to you and says “thank you” in the most sincerest voice and your heart truly feels like it might fall out of your chest 

you just tell him that “it was my pleasure” because it really was!!

a small moment passes between you two, but wooseok comes in and you two get embarrassed so you excuse yourself to go prepare for the final publishing 

wooseok totally teases yuto btw but one glare from the latter has the former cackling before he goes off into the shower

“you’re so whipped dude”

“shut. up.”

“it’s the truth~~~~~~”

“sleep with one eye open, woo”

when it gets published, everyone is freakin’ amazed ofc and those who read the piece actually get some proper insight on the misunderstood baseball player, and you hand deliver a copy to him because you’re so freakin’ ecstatic and proud because everyone loved it and it looks so great and 

well yuto is really happy and seeing happy is an absolute blessing 

as flustered as he is, he actually expresses a better expression of gratitude and tells you that “no one has ever done something like this for me and i really, truly appreciate it” 

you can feel your heart thudding and your throat closing up because he continues “and honestly, you’ve been on my mind like crazy y/n”

all you can manage is a “why?” but he’s relieved to see blush dusting on your cheeks

“because i want to get to know you and i want to understand you and i-” he whispers the last half: “thinkyou’rereallycute”

you’re almost in shock but you’re too elated tbh and you embarrassingly say, “i think you’re really cute too,,,,” 

so you both spend this impromptu first date wandering the park and going to the campus cafe and just talking but he lets you talk 

 in fact, he wants to know everything about you - why you started journalism and why you decided to take him on and what your favorite color is and what your favorite song is and all those little things that people tend to forget but him? 

he remembers them 

he remembers everything you tell him and he finds it so adorable how your nose scrunches and your features light up and how much you have to say even though you’re usually the one asking the questions

and it just feels so damn good to have someone show interest in you

like yeah sure you’ve made some strong connections and friendships but the way yuto asks you questions and absorbs your answers, even inputting his own feelings, you feel so happy because this isn’t some obligatory “tell me about yourself” it’s a genuine “please tell me more” 

each day you two learn new things about each other too which is really great if you didn’t realize just how mischievous he is 

LOL like it seems to be a hidden personality trait of his but you’ve come to find that being with yuto has become a series of getting soft pranked or just watching others get hardcore pranked and it’s kinda funny

you really wouldn’t expect it from him but the way he softly pranks you is just too adorable for you to get upset with

like well, the first time he ever told you he loved you, he steals your tape recorder from you - not really steal it but one minute it’s on your desk and another it’s in his hands and he’s fumbling with it but he manages to record over the blank tape and goes “y/n, did you know you’re an amazing person?” 

you can’t help but laugh because he has one of those sports newscaster voice and feigned serious face as he holds the tape recorder out to you in wait of an answer so you just shake your head “no sir, i did not” 

he grins, “well, did you know that i, adachi yuto, love you for being the amazing person you are?” 

and even though his cheeks are so blatantly red and yours are too, you’re stunned 

“i-i did not know that,,,,” and you lean in close and place your hand over his on the recorder and say, “but did you know that i, l/n y/n, love you too?” 

and he just pulls you into the sweetest kiss because he just feels so goddamn happy with you, so content, and most of all, so understood

the rest of the boys are really grateful for you because as comfortable as yuto has been with them, you’ve made it much easier for him and his transition because of the article

a lot of the time, people will come up to him and talk about his stats and baseball which he’s actually happy to converse about 

or even those people that kind of judged him at first, they’re not so,,,,, prejudiced y’know?

they have such a great insight on him as a player and it really is because of all the things you put into that article and you’re so damn proud of it

when you get thanked and welcomed into the group, they adore you man

they love how you aren’t afraid to tease yuto or go along with his playful antics and they love that you bring out this undeniably soft side to him that makes even wooseok go “awwww, my roomie has a heart~~” which is of course replied to with a glare that has even you giggling because that’s just how yuto is

like he’s still pretty intimidating looking but most of the school doesn’t think that as badly - it’s usually people on the street in the city

though there were a few people to stop you two because y’all just looked like The Aesthetic couple and it left you both really flustered 

even as you both continue on in your relationship, there are moments where you just fluster each other because y’all just so damn cute and neither of you two can take it

but it works - everything between you just works and it’s kinda perfect in an odd little way 

sometimes you bicker when he gets a little tsundere with you or if he pranks you a little too much (like hides your stuffed pochacco he won you at the fair very unfairly - poor milk bottle worker LOL) 

in the end, you’ll both apologize because you’re both that hyperaware of your actions and you’re both very accepting too 

you can pick up on things that he doesn’t realize and somehow he can do the same with you - with each other, it’s just.... right 

you understand him and he understands you, and honestly, neither of you could ask for anything better than that~~~~

(also lemme just say that on one of your gifts to him was a badtz maru charm for his bat or anything really because it reminded you of him and how pouty he got but literally everyone agreed)

(he hung it btw and it’s considered his lucky charm because he got his pitching speed up to 95.6 mph!!!!!!!!)

[sassasquashedgrapes]

Kardashian Dreaming

Had the coolest/most bizarre dream ever. 

I was seated at this meeting with Mama Kris Jenner, Rob was there and prolly the other family members, I can’t remember. And she was gonna hire me or wanted to hire me, and it was an interview or something am not so sure.  But basically my role was to hang around the whole Kardashian-Jenner clan, be on the prowl on the stuff they do, find research backing up evidence that what they do is effective by science (but way better than David Avocado Wolfe levels, more classier and actually backed up by a medical doctor (hello, me!), and yes, blog about it.

Or ghost write articles whatever floats my boat. Basically tag along with them, maybe occasionally take their pics for Instagram/Snapchat as to back up the article I wrote or blogged, but not in a PA kind of way.  I’m more like just like a third party observer, I am to be treated cordially and kindly, not like staff, whom I don’t like as some are bossy, snobby divas (must be competition syndrome who knows?).

I don’t get to be on the show either (Thank God, I wasn’t the type who wanted that sort of attention to begin with), but as a fan of the series, it’s a treat that I get a full-depth view of what goes on in the family for real and ahead from what’s aired on E!, way before everyone else gets to see it (of course I have a disclosure clause tho I can write anything, as long as Mama Jenner approves of the topic of course, like I report directly to her anyway and she does keep direct tabs with me on the stuff that I write).

Well, anyway, going back  to the story: Then Kris goes for the jugular and looks  me in the eye and says “we pay higher than 500 per hour”, kinda making me know she’s done her homework about me and that whatever I’m currently being paid for at my current job,  she’s willing to pay me higher (lol. 600 maybe?) and before y’all start thinking, I knew deep down Mama Kris meant she was gonna pay me at least 600 US Dollars per hour just to “keep up with them”,  and I had a fixed schedule of reporting 3-4x a week at least four hours to a maximum of 8 hours a day, as for specifics on time well, if there are evening events and if I’m free, I can go and would be paid double for night differential. All of which was pretty ok by me.

I learned in my 90 minute snooze that the Kardashian clan are actually pretty generous employers. Like you got free range around the house (of course you can’t enter the private rooms unless you’re invited by the owner to go in and there are CCTVs so they do know when PAs steal their stuff), you can eat whatever food is in the pantry (except stuff that’s labeled with the names of the girls if they’re saving it for later, like Kim writes her name on it labeled as “Kim” or “Kiki”, Kourtney uses a green tape label so you know it’s hers, shit this dream is so detailed, it was beyond!!!

Anyway, so I get the job yo’. I’m hanging out with Kanye West. He’s not even scary. He’s actually very nice and polite, not like the angry dude you always see on the telly.

So he’s going about talking being drawn to different kinds of wall graffitis (I swear I had no idea there were even types to begin with!  Shit there it is on google, people I am just typing this website and googling it down now because I thought that dream was just crack but fuuuucccck nnnhhooo!!!) and showed me this wall written with words like yeezy (yes written in bold with no caps on the first “y”) and a quote, I can’t remember but I know it was a cool quote about believing in yourself and pretty profound one at that. It took me a while to realize while talking to this man that he was in the process of making his own font!! People, Kanye West was designing his own fucking Times New Roman y’all!!! Prolly use the letterings to put it on his shirts, on his album, have it sold on Microsoft Office or whatnot, this shit is superb I simply cannot!!!.  It wasn’t a useless font,  it’s like a relatable font that could be used for making a slogan, a poster, or heck even as a document paper if you don’t mind wasting some ink on the printer.

It was super genius, I tell you. I remember giving him feedback about it (because he asked me, that’s how cool the ‘Ye is, he gets feedback from the masses coz he wants to understand the common people!) that I liked the design on the wall except if I stood at a certain distance, I couldn’t read the first word written on top (I can’t believe I had the nerve to talk up to the ‘Ye) but he was super cool about it and admitted he hadn’t thought about that but was “going with the creative flow” when he was in the moment and having an artistic flair myself, I understood where he was coming from.

Next I’m in the gym. Now I’m pretty certain this is recent, I cannot confirm if Khloe is pregnant but she sure wasn’t working out either.

Out of the Kardashian sisters, she’s the one I genuinely get along with the best. She even calls me by my first name Kristina, opting not to address me by my middle name which Kris and Kim do as I didn’t want to confuse myself into sharing a nickname similar to my new boss (aka Mama KJ). I dunno but I clicked best with Khloe and could honestly imagine that IRL we could be really good pals. She does have one interesting habit: she always has to turn off the lights when not in use.

It’s weird because you think one: these people are ridiculously rich but are stingy with electricity? Two, shouldn’t the Kardashian/Jenner fam invest in motion sensor lights? And Three: according to Khloe, she started getting back into this habit to reduce energy in lieu of Climate Change (of course), and it used to be the one reminder her dad, the late Robert Kardashian Sr  always made her do because, like me, she had a habit of leaving the lights on too.

So basically included on my job description was yep, turn off the lights each time I went out of a room or check if there are unused lights.

So one time I’m in the family gym, and Kim was there. Now out of all the Kardashian/Jenners (don’t tell Khloe ok, ORZ) Kim is my favourite. IRL she’s not tall, prolly around my height, but has a doll-face and is really curvy but small in the areas that matter. TBH Kim leaves me star-struck, very Kween- like: regal, formal, never losing her shit (unlike me the whole freaking dream sequence) but still approachable and likeable.

Out of all the Kardashian/Jenners, Kim is the most like Kris. Like literally Mama’s carbon copy, even in some mannerisms, except Kim is more reserved, polite, but still approachable without being intimidating, which that part is mostly like her Mom.  Though Kim can be intimidating in a different way.  Let’s just say both women have that Alpha air about them.

Kris Jenner is all business and is the the Queen Mom, kinda like my boss so it’s ironic I leave a job only to be hired by someone who resembles a lot of qualities similar to the former boss. But who can deny BIGGER and BETTER PAY?

As for Kim, I really can’t compare her to anyone I’ve ever met, but she’s definitely got an aura of being something extraordinary. Like Celebrity vibes.  That feeling one gets when you’re in the presence of someone who is gonna either change the world or bring it to its knees and end the rest of humanity, XD. 

 Anyway, I’m in the gym and I dunno why but there are icicles on the machines (the elliptical, the treadmill, the bikes)  I don’t feel cold or anything but it I chose to ignore it prolly coz I was astonished that there were icicles on the machines and yet no one bothers to turn off the AC and plus hello, I’m watching Kimye work out a sweat or rather, breathing cold air like some friggin’ Elsa with her long platinum hair which makes me miss own on bleached Khaleesi mane too.  Kim’s working on the treadmill, she gives me a polite smile and nod, and says hello, addressing me by my middle name (it’s shocking because I’ve barely been in this house or at this job for long, and already Kim knows me by name and face.  It’s like an amazing talent she and Kris have, they remember faces and names of people they’ve just met, whether you’re a Royalty or a servant, they’ll remember.  They’re like natural politicians!).  

Khloe asks me if I could turn off the lights, which was the gym, I dim it a bit, with Kim’s permission, of course.  She doesn’t mind, she’s in her own zone.  Breathing out cold air probably from those iced exercise machines I dunno (I believe I found new material for my writing blogs that I was hired for too).  

I move on to another side of the gym, which is a lounge area.  I see in the corner of my eye Kourtney having a informal business meeting with a blonde long-haired Japanese business dude who gives me Steve Aoki vibes, a translator (who is my friend Aira), and a bunch of other peeps lounging on sofas.  I yell over to Khloe and tell her that someone’s in the lounge room and she goes over to me and says “Oh yeah, leave the lights on.” Laughs off and walks away.

I’m not close with Kourt tho.  I don’t think we have bad vibes or anything, actually we’re the same age, it’s just Kourt and I never had a chance to bond because her top priority are her kids and we just never had time to chitchat, but I think she’s just as nice as the rest of the family, probably even more casual than Kim, but less chummy as Khloe.  She did mention once that I’m a natural with kids even though I never baby sat any of the Kardashian kids, but they’re really sweet and they seem to like me well enough.  

I’ve interacted with Mason, Reign, and Penny; they’re the sweetest kids, Reign and Penny always greet me with hugs, they’re super friendly.  Mason’s already a big boy, so hugs are not in order and he’s usually somewhere off doing his own thing or hanging out with Scott aka The Lord (who doesn’t seem like the douchebag he’s normally portrayed as in the show).  I’ve met North and Saint briefly as Kim was in a hurry, North’s a bit shy, she’s got the cutest smile tho. I just don’t think North warms up to people as easily as compared to Kourtney’s kids do tho.  Saint is adorable, as expected, but it’s too early to tell how he’s gonna be when he’s older, but he’s so darn cute. Saint reminds me of this kid of a friend of mine who was just about the cutest darnest little kid whom I preferred to babysit over his naughty older brother, Andrei, hahaha!

And as for the Kardashian-Jenner girls.  Well, all I can say is Kendall is by far the tallest and prettiest sister and has got the most amazing legs, but she’s moody as f tho.  Like let’s say she’d walk in a room I was in, she’d ignore me (unless I’d be the first one to greet her, then she’d respond with a bored hi or mumble something close to it) then Ken would do her own thing like sit on a corner of a table or lounge on a couch and interact with her sisters but mostly looks bored as if she’d rather be somewhere else more interesting than at home, which is kinda disappointing since I’m a huge fan of hers, but I get her deal.  She grew up into the whole limelight and unlike her older sisters, she never wanted any of it and if you asked her, she’d probably wish she was living a rather normal life. Plus the bad bitterness she has as a model and having to prove to everyone she’s a supermodel because people hate on her for the nepotism even though she really does work hard.  Basically Kendall is the Kuudere of the Kardashian/Jenner girls.  So I get her deal. But compared to Kun-Kuun Kenny, Kylie is more like the typical teen/Generation Z/late Millenial: Always on her phone, not really in tune with anything going on about in the house.  I like Jordyn Woods tho, she’s really friendly and warm that you don’t get an air vibe out of her, like she’s genuinely a nice girl that you’re glad she’s there for Kylie.  Maybe that’s the reason why Kylie’s got a lot more mellow than her older sister Kendall, since Kendall doesn’t have that sort of friendship from what I’ve seen based on that whole dynamic I’ve gathered in that 90 minute dream.

Oh, and as for Kylie being pregnant? Let’s just say, I can’t say :P

Lol.  If I had to make Dere-s out of them

Tsundere Type A: Kourtney

Himedere: Kim

Formerly Kamidere/ but now mostly Dandere: Kanye

Yandere: Khloe

Deredere but really Mayadere: Rob

Kuudere: Kendall

Undere/Ultimate Shota: Kylie

Sadodere: Kris Jenner (for sure!! Lol)

That dream was so awesome!!  Too bad I had to get up after dozing off when the alarm reminded me that I had to leave the house early because I had an exam. I woke up feeling shitty because I didn’t get enough rest and as I took a cold shower, it suddenly hit me that I had dreamed about this during that 90 minute accidental snooze and I found myself having to write it down, and added more of my personal in-depth thoughts because tho it was such a vivid dream that happened so fast, I’m amazed by how much insight I actually got based from those details that I decided to write it all down and post it on tumblr/twitter with hopes that I do wonder if any of this shit was accurate. 

 Hit me up to tell me what your thoughts are.  

I’m out!